Can anyone share with me the exact meaning of the phrase above. I search some definitions on the web and the cliché is 'When the going gets tough, the tough get going," endlessly quoted by football coaches, sales managers, and other neanderthal motivators, some results post as “when situations are difficult, strong people rise to the occasion”. How can you be strong when against all odds and face with tremendous load of stress & probelms in life.
Just to share something really enlighten me one day where a close collegue of mine whom i believe is very rich (hehe got a peep on his revenue tax slip...) but only to my suprise he only owns a 12++ year old junk car still working fortunately and living in a home (kind of below average to me) where you cannot even imagine he is actually earning that much with only such little enjoyment in life. Call him super stingy if you can but he is only in his late thirties and has already attained his financial freedom since he got no worries with lost jobs, recession, financial instabilities, others stress you name it that causes sleepless night. Of course not all i believe would want to share the kind of life like my friend has but i really trust all individuals has their own set of probelms, sadness or happiness whether you are in the highest corporate level, average guy, a nobody if you think you are etc. All voice down how you perceive life & how hard you try to be strong & postive whenever you are slap with undesire events & probelms. Your greatest opponent is yourself to defeat. Dont be disheartened by people who discourage you. Keep going!
There is a motivational article from adam koo below where i can of like it too about the movie "Rocky balboa" Read it for free!
“It Ain’t How Hard You Hit…It’s How Hard You Can Get Hit and Keep Moving Forward”
Have you ever wondered what is it like being a role one someone you admired, it could be a CEO of a company, President of the united states, top leaders, Artist, writers, professionals, researchers, business owners or anyone else you would most envied about their success. Just what factor contributes to their success today, I trust one of it has got to do with the art of practicing & use of effective time management!
The fact is how these people managed their time so well that they are able to deliver the result that was expected of them based on the sole constraint of 24hours 7 days a week no matter who or what you are.
Recently I pick up some articles from David Allen, productivity consultant who is best known as the creator of the Getting Things Done time management method who amazed me about his adventures into 35 types of profession before reaching age 35. Some of his best practices which I find relevant to me include getting your email volume controlled & organized as well as workflow management. He has also developed a 3 dimensional self management practice which consequently generates four quadrants of states which we may find ourselves in at least one segment;
1. Low control, low perspective = the Victim. Driven by latest and loudest, simply reacting to relieve the most obvious and immediate pressures and pains.
2. High control, low perspective = the Micro Manager. Obsessed with containing and ordering detail, neglecting the Why question and the bigger-picture realities. Obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) is the extreme.
3. Low control, high perspective = the Crazy Maker. Fabulous ideas, by the minute, unrealistically over committing focus and resources. Attention deficit disorder (ADD) is the extreme.
4. High control, high perspective = Master and Commander. Keeping the eye on the prize with attention to critical detail, holding steady with a firm but flexible hand.
(An extract from David Allen Three dimensional Self Management)
See which quadrant best describes you today because it will determine how you manage your time.
If you would have follow my last posting on the same subject of time management, maybe you would have already look into your weekly schedule and have in mind what actions you would plan to optimize your time allocation.
Below includes a completed worksheet input into the template I have created earlier based on typical activities of a working professional within my industry. You would noticed that there are things we spend most of our time in life habitually on basic activities beyond our control like rest/sleep, preparing for work, transportation, travelling, meals, dining, stuck in the traffic etc. These itself can take up half your day each day. It means you can only allow adjustment probably the other half of it by putting some effort in applying the following basic principles of time management;
- Planning
- Allocation
- Setting goals
- Delegation
- Analysis of time spend
- organizing
- Scheduling
-& prioritizing
From the worksheet, if my analysis is correct, there is still an opportunity for additional time of 37 hours which is about 44%!! Of the time you can allocate in a week on something else that you would like to do and benefit you more in life. Each individual may have their own technique or tools for time management respectively but with the application of the basic principles above in more detail you may maximize it even for greater results!
The point is some of us will always complain that we are just too busy or occupied with current activities/loading but these excuses can be alleviated with simple magic steps by just analyzing & identifying strategies you may have overlook before. So do not underestimate the power of time management, my tools work for me and I believe you can develop one for yourself too. Plan your strategies now and if possible share with others as well.
How often have we heard about time management, avoid procastination, effective schedulling, prioritization & many more other techniques for managing time in our daily personal & work life.
Not to mention about myself who are actually involved in project management to develop specific products in various industries for market launch on time! and yes I believed you can guess it by now that time management is very important in my work for success. Also some of us or maybe the majority of us has attended some related training courses as required according to our personal self development needs or at least for workload handling improvement.
The worst is most of the time you can't even tell your Boss that "i already have a very heavy workload got no time!!!" see what response you will get in return from him. Then maybe you will have your parents telling you, "Honey you have already spend so much time on the TV/DVD or maybe even on your favourite PS2 video games, it is time to go back to your room and finished up with your schoolwork"; then just as you are about to reply "but Mom" she will shut you off right away "no but just go" you feeling so dissapointed.
I am sure you all agree that effective time management is very important but honestly it can be difficult to achieve if it involves a change in our daily lives especially reducing the amount of time spend on things we enjoy doing most. Frankly telling me to cut down on my TV or DVD hrs spend a day will be almost definitely impossible since this has been my all time favourite activity when I was a kid ; during those days my parents use to limit my access time and now that I am all grown up there are basically no one to control other than myself. There are many of those proven techniques you can refer to from training materials or bookstore references which can be useful if you are committed for a change in your time management strategies.
Anyway though I am not a professional consultant on this topic myself however I like to share some tips on how we can manage time better by having a good look on your daily activities & assess each task based on the following common questions below;
1) Reason & its benefits;
I trust all actions or things you do must have a reason and its benefits otherwise you will not be doing it at all! The benefits itself can be related to just as simple as making you happy or even because i have been doing it all my life so just make me feel good. Just insert whatever input you can think off. It doesn't matter if it is something you like or dislikes. Note acting busy in office can be one action as well to be shown in your table, be honest to yourself because there is none other than yourself who will have access to the table.
2) Mandatory
A must actions, something of course related to your daily work like checking emails, printing orders etc.or even at home like preparing for work, school, sleep etc. For every actions you will need to estimate the duration spend on each task.
3) Goals
For every task you identify, pls state the goal achievable based on the specific actions. It can include customer satisfaction, make money, make my kids happy, better health & more...If there is none just include as it is because there may be cases we just don't know why we do certain things everyday.
4) Non-value add actions
You know most of us do have complain at times when there are actions that are a waste of time or unneccesary actions! The next question will be can it be changed or removed. I remember my wife always complain to me that she has to do all the house floor cleaning twice daily. This could be common causes of arguments for some married couples too. However after answering all my questions from 1 to 10 below, she decide to reduce it to only every alternate days or less and we live happily ever after.....you will know why when you have complete the same assessment for yourself.
5) Frequency of actions
How often you need to peform the task;
- Only Once
- Seldom
- Only when neccessary
- Daily
The next few questions is more of an analysis on the reverse if I would not need to carried out the task.
6) Can i omit the task
If your answer to question 2 above is YES, you may just leave blank for this item as the correlation is the opposite. However pls proceed and answer the next few questions.
7) Impact
Ask yourself what is the impact if you would not have done the task you have listed. Leave blank if there is no impact.
8) Delegation;
The next question will be can I delegate the task to others but note this is not telling you that you can push all your task to others. Rather you should review if there is anyone else that can perform the task much better & faster than if you would to do it yourself. It can be just as ridiculous to have me cook instead of my wife doing it even if someone will tell you "it is romantic if you can cook for your partner & she or he will love you more". Anyway I am not a dating expert but I do the cleaning up of dishes etc.. after our meal just for the record.
9) How much time will I save if delegate
Just estimate a number on how much time you will saved if you would to delegate the task to others by taking the time spend by you minus the time spend by others on the same task.
10) Favourites
Last but not least identify which task you have list as favourites for things you really enjoy doing at ease and would wish more time could be spend on it.
After you have complete questions 1 to 10 above, create another list for things that you wish to have but you are occupied and complete the same process from 1 to 10 above again but this time omit those that are not relevant.
You may want to think about what you have done in the past week and create a table like something below.
The goal of the exercise is basically to identify if there is any task where you can spend more focus on and include some other potential task which could be an opportunity loss to maximize your results. According to Pareto 80-20 rule the law of the vital few and the principle of factor sparsity states that, for many events, roughly 80% of the effects come from 20% of the causes and these law has been widely use in other applications. The Pareto principle was a prominent part of the 2007 bestseller The 4-Hour Workweek by Tim Ferriss. Ferriss recommended focusing one's activities to those 20% that contribute to 80% of the income. In our case i believe 20% of our valuable time spend can fetch you 80% of the results in your life!
In my next post, i will like to share how to include the detail analysis with scoring based on importance & relevance to identify priority actions you should focus & control.
BTW there are also the habits that can have effect on time management which I am sure some of you might have already heard about the 7 habits of highy effective people by Stephen R. Covey.
Habit 1: Be Proactive: Principles of Personal Choice
Habit 2: Begin with the End in Mind: Principles of Personal Vision
Habit 3: Put First Things First: Principles of Integrity & Execution
Habit 4: Think Win/Win: Principles of Mutual Benefit
Habit 5: Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood: Principles of Mutual Understanding
Habit 6: Synergize: Principles of Creative Cooperation
Habit 7: Sharpen the Saw: Principles of Balanced Self-Renewal
An extract from; http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Seven_Habits_of_Highly_Effective_People
Start your time management now! & pls share if you have any other effective strategies because i know most techniques are unique to each individual. You just need to find the right one for yourself which you can adopt without much pain.
The following quoted by Rachel Zupek a writer in career builder.com who has some tips below to handle office politics as I believe it would be everywhere in a working place;
{Politics in the workplace can get vicious – and we’re not talking about the governmental kind. Rather, office politics, or how power and influence are managed in your company, will be a part of your career whether you choose to participate in them or not.
Some workers say they don’t want to get caught up in politics at work, but most experts argue that playing the game is crucial to your career success. By not getting involved, you may find your talents ignored and your success limited, and you may feel left out of the loop, says Louellen Essex, co-author of “Manager’s Desktop Consultant: Just-in-Time Solutions to the Top People Problems That Keep You Up at Night.”
“Politics get nasty when an employee is out for his or her personal gain alone,” Essex says.
“Think of playing office politics as a game of strategy through which you are able to get the resources and influence you need to accomplish your goals. Most often those who are diplomatic, respectful and build coalitions with effective people win.”
Here are Essex’s nine tips to help you win at office politics and still gain others' respect.
1. Observe how things get done in your organization.
Ask some key questions: What are the core values and how are they enacted? Are short- or long-term results most valued? How are decisions made? How much risk is tolerated? The answers to these questions should give you a good sense of the culture of your organization.
2. Profile powerful individuals.
Pay attention to their communication style, network of relationships and what types of proposals they say “yes” to most often. Emulate those traits by drawing on the strengths you have.
3. Determine strategic initiatives in the company.
Update your skills to be relevant to company initiatives. For example, don’t lag behind in technology, quality or customer service approaches that are crucial to you and your company’s success.
4. Develop a personal track record as someone who gets results.
Style without substance will not gain others’ respect, especially in today’s organizations that focus on outcome.
5. Don’t be afraid to toot your own horn.
If no one knows of your good work, you may lose at the game of office politics – when you really deserve to win. Let others know what you’ve accomplished whenever you get the opportunity. If you don’t know the fine art of diplomatic bragging, you might get lost in the shuffle of your co-workers.
6. Treat everyone with respect.
Don’t show preferential treatment or treat co-workers badly. You never know to whom someone might be connected, and rude behavior may come back to bite you.
7. Don’t align too strongly with one group.
While an alliance may be powerful for the moment, new leadership will often oust existing coalitions and surround themselves with a new team. Bridging across factions may be a more effective strategy for long-term success if you intend to stay in your current organization for some time.
8. Learn to communicate persuasively.
Develop an assertive style, backed with solid facts and examples, to focus others’ attention on your ideas and proposals. Good politicians can adjust their messages for their audience ands are always well-prepared.
9. Be true to yourself.
After analyzing the political landscape in your company, if you decide the game is one you can’t play, prepare to move on. It’s not typical, but some organizations actually condone – even promote – dishonest, ruthless or unethical behavior. The game of office politics in this situation is not one worth winning.
Rachel Zupek is a writer and blogger for CareerBuilder.com. She researches and writes about job search strategy, career management, hiring trends and workplace issues.
In addition the following is what I think will be important as well;
1) Develop your own value;
Create your values of course not only recognised by your boss or superior but to as much individuals in your company as well. This is more of like branding your values in your organization. You can possess any values which can support the company vision or core values. Search out for those usually indicated in your company profile presentations. See how much you can relate to your own values.
2) Helping others;
Whenever possible help others as much as you can; cannot run away from this good deed but of course not to the extend where you have to do others jobs or task. Rather what i mean is support others in whatever means to help them perform their job better. These can be as simple as sharing the pain or complains they have in their job and if you are really professional enough maybe you can relay some advise to them too or just provide some ideas you had based on your past experience or lesson learnt to others. Just try not to be selfish as you will never know the favor you will be returned when the wheel of fortune turn around.
3) Beaware of backstabbers!!
They are everywhere in any company, you cannot avoid as these are part of survival skills in any organization. In this case better to identify them in an early stage instead.
Analyse what are the things you can avoid easily not to be caught off handedly by these people. No one is perfect but I believe if you are more careful, you can handle the situation better.
4) Positive Emotions
Express those positive emotions I mentioned previously in my post (power of positive emotions) as far as possible. Be professional at all times if you can, stay calm and people will recognized your values eventually.
5) Avoid rumours & gossip
You can listen to rumours but try not to pass on the message to others by gossiping. You will never know as the message may end up to the not intended recipient ears. Worst still message spread by rumours are usually modified, mutated & corrected to the tendency of something bad!
6) Be smart
Like what Rachel mentioned above in point 9, if you think you can't win the office politics in your current environment, move on; find somewhere where you will. I don't believe there will be none, you just need to find it through persistence rather than surrendering to fate & not doing anything about it.
Somehow at one point in our life we can be expose to many things like;
Being laid off from your job
Worry of unemployment
Dealing with the death of a loved one
Getting divorced or married
Argument with collegues, boss or family members
Dealing with money probelms
Moving to a new home or having a baby
Pressure in work
unable to attain something you desire
that lead to negative emotions like sadness, stress, anxiety, anger, hate. We also understand greatly this has direct impact to our health because it weakens our immune system as the body responds to the way you think, feel, & act increasing your risk to develop a poor health conditions like cold, infections, back pain, upset stomach, insomnia, headaches etc.. Also when you are feeling stressed, anxious or upset, you may not take care of your health as well as you should. You may not feel like exercising, eating nutritious foods or taking medicine that your doctor prescribes. Abuse of alcohol, tobacco or other drugs may also be a sign of poor emotional health. This may even further lead to more severe conditions like heart probelms, high blood pressure, breathing, weight probelms & others.
I believe most of us are already aware of the facts above but somehow it is just hard for us to control our emotions whenever there is a change in our lives be it a "bad" or "good" change.
Here are some good positive emotions and actions where you can just express almost effortlessly that drive positive actions & of course can have adverse reactions in the long term;
1) Loving & trust;
I am sure most of us at least would love ourselves everyday otherwise you would not be leaving untill today. Those that hated themselves and blame everyone for it turn to drugs, alcohol abuse, self destruction actions & some case involved hurting others like family/children abuse, fights etc..if you are experiencing the latter suggest you seek counseling or profesional medical attention because you must first learn to love yourself. Then you extend your love & trust to your love ones. It is not hard at all just to tell your mum, spouse, kids, or even your friends, partners how much you love them everday and fate brought us together!! Only through these you can share your feelings of sadness, worry, stress with them for things that are bothering you eventhough they may not be the right person to deal with your feelings appropriately but keeping it to yourself can have worst long term effect according to some medical advise. Sometimes the person you have shared your probelms may differ you to others more appropriate if they share the same love & care as you do and this is the long term reaction part of it. Love yourself, others & get loved as well!!!! Many of times social probelms are associate with loneliness, not accepted in the society, not loved & care by others.
2) Believing & have faith
I remember watching the movie "matrix evolution" towards the end when all good relapsed and evil defeated; SERAPH ask the Oracle: Did you always know? ORACLE claims: Oh no. No, I didn't. But I believed.I believed ...
Yes by believing in yourselves something you hold on to makes you motivated even the outcome may not be what we have expected but it drives your actions at least close to it. But of course don't rely entirely only on faith as an excuse for laziness which is why believing in faith should relate your actions towards taking chances whenever opportunities arise rather than be fear of failure.
3) Thankful & appraisal
Be appreciative to your fellow friends, collegues or any one else who you know. It does not take to lift a heavy rock by just saying words like "you have done well", "your support is most appreciated", "what a great idea you have" and many more appraisal greetings you can express whenever you want to appreciate others for their excellent help or companionship. Appreciate & respect others and you will eventually be respected. People will tends to offer their help willingly because they know at least they are very much appreciated at the end of it. There are people whom i know have never show their gratitude to others for their help as if it is their job to do so. Remember even if you have the authority to tell someone to do something without appreciating, that person will only carried out the task unwillingly, half heartedly, the results will be different.
4) Forgiving
How many of us really be the first to step out and say i am sorry for any argument or conflicts we are caught in where this is the only magical word to calm someone down and slowly bring that person to your detail discussion to access the probelm or conflicts. You can always say " I am sorry if i have offended you in some of my remarks but i think there is some misunderstand at first, lets sit down and discuss to identify the probelm" as an example. Be professional and forgiving otherwise 2 hotheaded will be drawing swords, no resolutive actions can be concluded.
5) Humorous & joyful
Create jokes whenever it is appropriate in any occasions of communicating with anyone. People will tends to exhange jokes with you too and makes you happy.
Try not to obsess about the problems at work, school or home that lead to negative feelings. This doesn’t mean you have to pretend to be happy when you feel stressed, anxious or upset. It’s important to deal with these negative feelings, but try to focus on the positive things in your life too. You may want to use a journal to keep track of things that make you feel happy or peaceful. Some research has shown that having a positive outlook can improve your quality of life and give your health a boost. You may also need to find ways to let go of some things in your life that make you feel stressed and overwhelmed. Make time for things you enjoy.
Of course there are more positive emotions in addition but the above can have significant impact to your life and their are not too difficult to express. Try it, stay happy & healthy!!!!!
My best scene & scripts from one of my favourites movie & arthur "Lord of the rings trilogy by JRR Tolkien;
[We see how inside the city the people are running from Sauron's forces as the Nazgûl fly around the city again. Everything looks hopeless as the enemy tries to break the gate the men are defending. Farther away, Gandalf and Pippin are sitting together, watching the destruction. The hobbit turns to look at Gandalf.]
Pippin: "I didn't think it would end this way..."
Gandalf: "End? No, the journey doesn't end here. Death is just another path...One that we all must take."
[Pippin listenes and watches Gandalf, as he continues. All sounds of the surrounding battle quiet down.]
Gandalf: "The grey rain-curtain of this world rolls back, and all change to silver glass..."
[There is a little smile on Pippin's face.]
Gandalf: "...And then you see it."
Pippin: "What? Gandalf? ...See what?"
[As Gandalf continues, we can hear the melody of 'Into the West' on the background.]
Gandalf: "White shores...and beyond... the far green country under a swift sunrise."
[They both smile as they look at each other.]
Pippin: "Well, that isn't so bad."
Gandalf: "No...No it isn't."
Mankinds lives a short span of life unlike elves where they are immortal but their spirits shall not bound to world. I trust mankind's fate is devoted to our almighty God and in fact it is hope we hold on to in our every day lives.....
Very touching story below forwarded by one of my collegue. Eventhough at most times life is full of complication but we can actually simplify it through our thoughts & expectations in life.
Don't take too hard upon yourself at times or expect too much in life as it can be short but if you lead a happy life you are the ultimate winner and the memories shall pass on for others to understand the importance of life.
Even under the worst circumstances in life, there is still people who can still lead a happy life.
So be grateful & enjoy your reading below!!!
The girl in the picture is Katie Kirkpatrick, she is 21 . Next to her, her fiancé, Nick, 23. The picture was taken shortly before their wedding ceremony, held on January 11, 2005 in the US . Katie has terminal cancer and spend hours a day receiving medication. In the picture, Nick is waiting for her on one of the many sessions of chemo to end.
At the reception, katie had to take a few rests. The pain did not allow her to stand for long periods
We should stop making our lives complicated.
Break the rules
forgive quickly
kiss passionately, love truly
laugh constantly
And never stop smiling
no matter how strange life is
Life is not always the party we expected to be
but as long as we are here,
we should smile and be grateful.
Jim Francis is a serious researcher, who has a background in hypnosis and electronic design. (He once owned an electronic design company that specialized in designing circuitry that was considered “impossible.”) He is a New Zealander, who now spends his time between Australia, New Zealand, and the United States. Jim founded the Australasian Lateral Thinking Newsletter and has been its editor for the past twelve years. He has also been an active skydiver, writer, pilot, and guitarist. In his research Jim describes what luck really is (a personal, psychokinetic resonance with the environment), how it appears to operate in distinct cycles, and describes how, under certain circumstances, luck can be triggered at will.
Jim also describes how our sixth sense (intuition) can be made available, and how it can be easily trained, to become as reliable as our usual five senses.
Jim describes how the human mind can easily influence other minds, to produce a win-win outcome.
He also describes a unique problem-solving mechanism that can trigger answers to critical problems, during the normal sleep cycle - - and describes a simple method of dream control.
Jim writes about Remote Viewing or RV, which, in its simplest definition is “the ability to access information from a remote geographic location using something other than the known five senses.” The term was coined by Ingo Swann at the American Society for Psychical Research in the early 1970s. Remote Viewing research has been carried out by Stanford Research Institute (SRI), Scientific Applications International Corporation (SAIC), and the American Government, notably the U.S. Army.
Jim has undertaken training in various forms of remote viewing, and shows how 'RV' can be learned by anybody, and put into serious, practical applications.
Apart from Jim’s description of his mind discoveries and their application, he also points to the serious science that supports his concepts... Jim describes how individuals can take advantage of these scientific concepts, to understand how our intuitive mind works.
The idea that an altered state of consciousness can facilitate the retrieval of anomalous information is not new. This system of retrieval of hidden information has been termed ESP or psi.
Altered states occurring during sleep, relaxation, hypnosis, meditation, and sensory isolation have all been found to be psi-conducive. For instance, hypnosis has been employed as a psi-facilitative state in experimental studies including card-guessing and ESP. Highly significant dream studies were also conducted at Maimonides Hospital in New York in the 1960s.
Jim describes practical, altered state, exercises that are based on these discoveries.
By following Jim’s methods, which he describes in great detail, individuals can gain a much greater use of their mind’s potential.
I have known Jim for several years now and have been impressed with his energy, in pushing the envelope of what we know about our mind’s capabilities. Not only does Jim research and document his discoveries, but he puts them into practical application. For example, after developing his Mind Surge and Luck Cycle concepts, he put them to practical use. He has won over 130 casino jackpots, that he has used to fund further research.
He writes extensively about his discoveries, and believes that they are for sharing with others, rather than keeping them to himself.
Some best motivational stories to share below; so never give up in your life as all events happen for a reason to good!!!
Climb Every Mountain In Life
By: Sean Swarner
I'm actually the first (and only) cancer survivor to summit the world's highest mountain... Mt. Everest. When I was only 13, I was diagnosed with Hodgkin's disease and given three months to live. When I was 15, I was diagnosed with Askin's Sarcoma. The prognosis was much worse as the doctors gave me only two weeks to live. Again, I survived.
Being the only person in the world to have ever had these two cancers, I really felt I should share my story to help motivate others and influence lives. On May 16th, 2002 at 9:32am, I became the first cancer survivor to summit Mt. Everest.
Since then, I have been lucky enough to reach the summits of three more of the world's seven highest peaks and have spoken internationally about my life and adventures to countless people and organizations. On the summit of Everest I brought a flag adorned with names of people who have been affected by cancer and left it on the top of the world forever commemorating the struggle of cancer patients worldwide.
I did the same to the highest point in Africa, Europe and just recently returned from 23,000-foot Aconcagua in South America! My ultimate goal is to climb the highest mountain on each continent AND trek to the North and South poles.
I am covering the globe with inspiration. There are plans for live chat sessions during the expeditions as well as TV spots and live summit bids from a number of the mountains! The reason for these expeditions is to inspire those affected by cancer (as well as anyone with a pulse!) to dream big and never give up.
NO EXCUSES, NO LIMITS.
By: Denny Chipollini
Over a decade ago, I experienced a series of life-altering events that started with a serious car accident I was involved in which severed both of my legs. Doctors reattached both legs, but my reattached left leg eventually had to be amputated due to massive injury and infection.
Today I refer to my accident and leg as "gifts" because these events helped me to change my life for the better! Two months after my accident and while I was undergoing one of 15 surgeries to try to save my leg, my wife was wheeled into the same hospital to give birth to our son, Nicholas. Doctors told me I would never walk again, but I refused to accept that diagnosis and instead started my own rehab with Nicholas as my main motivation to walk again. With a lot of sweat and pain I used visualization and what every exercises I could do will laying in a hospital bed.
Nicholas and I learned how to walk together, something I will never forget. 4 years from my accident I ran in my first 5k with the use of a prosthetic leg to thank all my family and friends that had supported me and my family through this difficult time. But this incredible accomplishment was soon overshadowed by devastating news about my son.
Nicholas was diagnosed with an incurable genetic disorder, neurofibromatosis (NF). NF causes tumors to grow on the nerve endings of the body internally and externally as well. Lesions can be removed but usually grow back in clusters. There is a risk of developing optic gliomas behind the eyes and brain tumors, to names just a few of the possiblies. NF also carries along with it, learning disabilities, ADHD and Tourrette Syndrome as well.
I did a lot of soul-searching to find the positive in what was happening, and as a result I realized that I could share my personal story of confronting and overcoming adversity to inspire others, especially children, to overcome whatever adversity they may be struggling with. I also realized the media attention I attracted when I ran the 5k, so I decided to use my 'gift' that was given to me in the accident to run marathons to help raise awareness and funds to find cures not only for NF, but also for other childhood disorders, diseases and disabilities.
I also have a mission to educate people on these disorders, diseases and disabilities so understanding can breed compassion and acceptance. In 2001, in addition to running in the Olympic Torchbearers Relay in Philadelphia and the Paralympic Torchbearer Relay in Utah, I was told I was one of the few people to do so I also ran in the San Diego (2000), Pittsburgh (2001) and NYC marathons (2001), three marathons in 18 months, to get the word out to help children who need our help.
I have turned a dream of mine into reality by starting a non-profit organization called Generation Hope to put my dreams into action by inspiring and educating kids and adults alike to overcome adversity and accept diversity with "no excuses and no limits" (that's my motto for life!).
In May, I successfully walked and biked over 400 miles across the state of Pennsylvania (from Pittsburgh to Philadelphia) to share my message of perseverance and hope, and to model for kids and the country what it means to take action in your life to help others-it's my way of not just talking the talk but also literally walking the walk! I have been fortunate enough to receive many honors and awards including being an Olympic Torchbearer, UPS' Community Service Award, Ford Motor Company's National "Commitment to Kids" Award, "Distinguished Graduate" from the high school I went to and being featured in numerous newspaper and magazine articles and on various news programs.
I am honored to be featured as one of the twelve inspiring stories in Montel Williams' new book, A Dozen Ways to Sunday, and I had the thrilling experience of being a guest on the Montel show. While these honors and awards mean a great deal to me, being able to present in schools and share with students my message is truly my greatest honor!
My motivational talks with kids in schools helps me to fulfill my commitment to making a positive difference for kids by letting them see what it means for one person to overcome adversity which we all face in one degree or another, by sharing with them the importance of accepting and celebrating diversity in themselves and others, and by motivating others to believe in themselves to achieve worthwhile goals and to find the hero within themselves.
And what is most exciting to me is that I am seeing my efforts pay off with the most important people in my life-my children-and the changes are especially evident with Nicholas. The past years in school were very difficult for Nicholas because his classmates were teasing him with names (with NF, some physical affects are freckling of the skin and so kids began teasing him by calling him names like "freckle boy" and "freakazoid"), bullying him, and isolating him from activities and friendships because of his differences. What's so unfortunate is most of us, regardless of the generation we grew up in, can probably remember kids in our classes that were different and rather than being befriended and seen as the heroes they are for what it takes for them to get to school and function at a level to keep up with others, they were instead teased, isolated and picked-on.
Part of my mission to is shift this behavior and it's happening with Nicholas! I have given talks in Nicholas' school to help his classmates understand his disorder and to challenge them to ask themselves if they would pick on someone who, for example, has a prosthetic or some other difference or would they instead befriend and help that person. With his classmates having a new perspective and understanding, Nicholas is having a great year in school and his grades and friendships are showing it! It's living proof that my message does have an impact on kids and it makes a difference, and it motivates me to continue sharing it with others.
I am committed to sharing with others my experiences so they can find ways to connect with the compassionate and inspired side of life without having to go through a tragedy. Now faced with another challenge due to a blood transfusion, I received after my car accident. I started a drug therapy, for hepatitis C, which can make me very sick for a year. It is a life-threatening ordeal, but I will continue to talk to kids. See I work best when I have a challenge in front of me. We use exercise as a family affair. My wife Suzanne, is an ACE certified trainer and along with training adults, she is working on fitness programs for children as well. Exercise and God's love has helped me to reach inside myself and in doing so I can now reach way beyond the stars. "NO EXCUSES, NO LIMITS."
I am a concerned parent, please help us to get the message out. This message is so important in today's world. My story and my son's story hits hard. Many kids have tears in their eyes and some have even passed out when I give my presentation. There is no tolerence for bullying or any other type of this behavior. Many people of all ages can be effected, although everyone can benefit from the message. If you think we can work together to help each other's causes, well lets do it. Thank you for your time and God bless.
Please visit Generation Hope's website at http://www.genhopeusa.org/.
Want More?
By: Sue Dickinson
Isn’t life fantastic? Even if there are problems at the moment, think of all of the wonderful gifts that surround us. We have the ability to visit museums and beautiful parks for little, if any, charge. We can attend movies and live shows for just the price of a ticket. We have the option to eat out at an unlimited number of restaurants, and choose from an almost obscene array of groceries at the corner store. And on top of all that, we have special people in our life that we can share our love and care with.
Let’s face it, when we compare our lives to what’s happening in the rest of the world, we’ve got it pretty good. Even just the fact that we have access to a computer places us in a tiny percentage of the human population.
But, does contemplating the wonderful blessings in your life just make you feel worse, or, at the least, a little uncomfortable? You are not alone. I have come to the conclusion that this happens because when we accept that we have it good (great even), we tell ourselves subconsciously that we shouldn’t want more, and we are held back from achieving everything we desire in life.
I remember when I was a kid the adults in my life always told me to "be grateful, because there are kids in (fill in the blank, latest starving, poor country being covered by the media) starving and you can’t even finish dinner", or some variation on the theme. To them, it was an attempt to get me to be thankful, but part of me began to believe that "wanting more" was a selfish and uncharitable thing to do.
I can’t lie, personal possessions are a big piece of the whole "wanting more" concept. With an absolute smorgasbord of stuff available to us, it is hard to sit back and say, "I’ve had enough". Do you remember Templeton the Rat from "Charlotte’s Web?" When Templeton visited the fair and saw all the wonderful food available to him (ok, it was trash, but he was a rat, after all), he couldn’t control himself. He ate and ate and ate until his tummy dragged on the ground and he could barely move. Hopefully, we are not so gluttonous for personal possessions. But having a certain amount of possessions is helpful and satisfying in our lives.
However, there is another element to "wanting more" that we face every day. This is the psychological "more." It is an undefined nagging in our soul to "do more," to "be more," to "make a difference." For the most part, we all go about our lives, doing our jobs, caring for our families, and don’t even recognize that the yearning to change is there. But, it is, just the same. So, although we may feel happy and content with our lives, there is always something gnawing at us, telling us there is more.
Each person experiences this emotional hunger differently. Maybe you wanted to change careers, but instead you took the "safe road." Maybe you have had a lifelong dream to skydive, but haven’t tried it because you are afraid of heights. Fear plays a big role in holding us back, and I have found that it is the activities that I fear the most that, if pursued, eventually lead to the greatest fulfillment.
For example, I have always been afraid of public speaking. I have chosen my career, my relationships and my lifestyle to avoid public speaking whenever possible. I’ve also stayed away from management, because I believed that I wasn’t "management material". While I find my life rewarding, you can imagine the roadblocks I have encountered with that sort of mindframe.
But, I finally faced my fear a couple of years ago and joined Toastmasters. If you are not familiar with it, Toastmasters International is an organization designed to help individuals become better public speakers, communicators, and leaders. WOW, was I intimidated the first time I got up to speak! Terrified doesn’t begin to define it. But, as with anything you work at, it got easier and easier to stand and speak coherently (if not eloquently). And now, almost two years later, I have come to realize that despite the fact that I may never be totally comfortable speaking in public, I can do it, and in a way that others will benefit from my message.
And although facing my fear of public speaking didn’t change my life by making me want to become Oprah Winfrey, it did change my life. First, I learned how much I like to prepare speeches (as opposed to delivering them), which started me writing again, something I haven’t done seriously since college. Second, I became an officer of the club and learned that I actually do have some leadership qualities, despite my previous misconceptions.
In short, facing a fear that I had opened new doors to me – but not in the direction I anticipated at all! While I have no idea where my newfound skills will take me in life, I am up to the challenge.
I’ll bet you are up to the challenge too! Although I don’t know what it is for you, I know that you will find it if you allow yourself to "want more." Because, I have finally concluded that the endless desire we all have for "more" isn’t because we are ungrateful for what we have or because we have a selfish need for the latest model car or more clothes. Instead, what we are searching for is the challenge itself!
I hear you. It’s challenge enough some days just to make it through. But, deep down, something is prodding you to go for it anyway. It is all part of our inner calling to "want more." Not more things, or more money (ok, maybe a little more money). But to want more of ourselves.
It has been said that all healthy people look for challenges. If you aren’t facing a challenge you are standing still. So join me! Let’s stop standing still and being spectators. Accept the challenge. Want more……of yourself.
Words of Wisdom
By: Catherine Pulsifer
Eighteen years ago, I hit a brick wall. I had a job I hated that was literally making me sick. My marriage was in trouble; my finances were a disaster; and, I lived many miles away from my family.
I felt I had hit bottom. The easy way out would have been to feel sorry for myself and blame the world for my misfortune, to moan and groan about how unfair life is.
Instead, I found my way to the public library and discovered a new world in the self-help section. It focused my energy on positive results, rather than on the "poor me" syndrome. I started reading books on setting goals, positive thinking, psychology, autobiographies, attitudes, and so on.
At that time, I started to collect quotes. I discovered that certain quotes made me stop and think; they made me challenge my beliefs, while others gave me hope.
Without realizing it, I was searching for answers. Why are some people more successful than others?
How do they cope with challenges? Other people had more serious problems than I did. How did they keep a positive attitude and overcome their problems?
Through all my years of reading and research, I found two consistent qualities of successful people: ATTITUDE, and GOALS.
ATTITUDE A "positive attitude" is definitely one of the keys to success.
My definition of a positive attitude is a simple one: Looking for the good in all circumstances.
Applying it to everyday life is not as simple as it seems. Some situations in life challenge us to see the good. For example, the death of someone close to us, a health problem, the loss of a job, a relationship that doesn't work out. It is difficult to maintain a positive attitude in these situations.
If you accept what has happened and search for the positive, you will be able to move forward in your life. By embracing this attitude, you eliminate the "poor me syndrome". Attitudes play a very important role in our lives.
How do you react when faced with: - change - challenges - failures - stress
--Change In today's society, change is constant. Although change has always occurred in every society, today it is much more rapid due to technological advancements and a global market.
If you resist change, you will face challenges on a daily basis. If you consciously refocus your attitude to see the benefits of change, your outlook becomes positive and life becomes easier.
--Challenges We all face challenges. How we react to them is what really makes a big difference. Some people overreact and make mountains out of the proverbial molehill. Facing our challenges head on and setting goals to take us through and beyond the challenge, helps us cope with the hurtles we all confront.
There is nothing worse than being unable to see light at the end of the tunnel. I have learned to focus my energies on solutions, not on the challenge itself. So often, I have seen people waste energy by moaning and groaning about a problem. Yet, if they just realigned their attitude and focused on the solution or on the opportunity, the challenge would not seem as big as they think it is.
--Failure How do you see failure?
If you accept failure as an opportunity to learn, it will change your whole perspective. Some people allow failures to stop them form ever attempting anything new. Rather than learn and move on, these people get stuck forever.
--Stress Today, we hear over and over again that people are stressed. Stress, however, is created by our attitude. How we perceive a situation and how we react to it is the basis of our stress. If you focus on the negative in any situation, you can expect high stress levels. However, if you try and see the good in the situation, your stress levels will greatly diminish.
I attended a course on stress where the instructor explained that we create our own "stressors". We actually create our own stress by our perception of events. Yes, there are external events that cause us concern, but how we perceive the event determines the stress we feel. That thought has stayed with me over the years. When I feel overwhelmed and my stress levels rise, I stop and step back from the situation and put the even in perspective. I always ask myself - what difference will this make in five years time? Most of the time, it will not make any significant difference in my life. Just answering that question helps reduce my stress level. For those events that will make a difference in five years, I reduce stress by focusing my energy on finding solutions.
GOALS I have a strong belief in setting goals. I set a goal 13 years ago for my professional career and surpassed it 5 years ago. I set a goal of writing a book with the quotes and stories I have been saving - I achieved that goal in 1998 when "Wings of Wisdom" was published. And after many, many redesigns of Wings of Wisdom 4 U! website, the goal of my own website has been accomplished. My goals kept me focused. As a result, you are now reading what was once only a thought, a dream!
Goals do work! The easiest way to set goals is to answer the following questions: - What is it I want to achieve? - When do I want to achieve it? - Where am I today land what action do I need to take to achieve my goal?
Write down your answers. Writing out your goals is important as determining what they are. You are committing yourself to achieve these goals, and, at the same time, sending a strong, positive message to your subconscious mind.
--What is it I want to achieve? There are various ways to determine this. One way to answer this question is to write down the things you consistently wish for. Be specific. For example, the type of job you want; how much money you want to earn; the type of relationships you want to have; where you want to live; the kind of house you want to live in; what type of car you want to drive, and so on.
Another method is to write goals by category: Career, financial, family, leisure, educational, vacation, spiritual, and so on.
-- When do I want to achieve it? There are two types of goals: - short term goals (1-2 years) - long term goals (5-10 years)
Your short term goals should support your long term goals. Let me point out, however, that over time, your long term goals may change. If so, adjust your short term goals to support your long term. Goals should be flexible, not carved in stone!
Having said that, the time period you give yourself to finish your goal is still important. Time frames help you stay focused by giving you milestones by which to measure your progress. By committing to a time frame, you are making a commitment to yourself. We can easily be side-tracked after we set goals. A written commitment will help keep you on track.
- Where am I today and what action do I need to take to achieve my goal? The most important step in goal setting is TAKING ACTION. You can decide on your goal and you can write it down, but unless you take action, the goal is useless.
In order to achieve a goal, you need to identify the actions you must take. For example, in what areas will additional knowledge be required? What areas will you have to develop or learn new skills?
As you work on your goals, you should also review your progress. I usually review my goals every six months. I determine if I am on track, if I need to make adjustments, and if my goals and time frames are realistic. By doing this, you are actually charting your own progress. It always gives me a sense of self-achievement, and allows me to renew my commitment to my future goals. If I am not on target, I make the necessary adjustments. The most important thing is that I am moving forward even if I am not always progressing at the speed I originally planned.
Goals allow you to see light at the end of the tunnel, whether the light be a new career, a promotion, a prosperous business, or advanced training. You may not be where you want to be today, but by setting goals you are changing your life and moving toward where you want to be.
When people find themselves in situations with little or no hope, they give up. They convince themselves they are satisfied with where they are, or what they have.
Goals give us hope! For me, goals are my road map to the life I want. They have helped me accomplish things I once thought were impossible.
What is interesting about goals is that once you are committed and start to implement your plan, you will make important discoveries just by keeping a focus on attaining your desired result.
My hopes in sharing my story with you is that it will make you stand back and look at your attitude and your goals. My background is a simple one, I grew up in the country, we were never without, but there was no money for extras. My education - a graduate from high school, it was years later when I upgraded my education by taking classes at night and by correspondence. My own accomplishments proved to me that "attitude and goals" do make a difference in our lives! It can make a difference in your life also!
Read many more stories at http://www.motivational-inspirational-corner.com/motivational_inspirational_stories.html
Inspire by the philosophies & mind mastery technique developed by a young singaporean who utilize these secrets from an underachiever to his success of financial freedom & make a million dollar at only the age of 26.
About the person admired;
Adam Khoo is an entrepreneur, a best-selling author and a peak performance trainer. A self-made millionaire by the age of 26, he owns and runs several businesses in education, training, event management and advertising, all with a combined annual turnover of $30 million. He is the Executive Chairman and Chief Master Trainer of Adam Khoo Learning Technologies Group Pte Ltd and a director of seven other private companies. Adam is also a director of the Singapore Health Promotion Board (HPB).
He is also the best-selling author of nine books including ‘ I Am Gifted, So Are You!’ that was ranked MPH#1 best-seller in 1998 and 1999.. His other books include ‘How to Multiply Your Child’s Intelligence’ & ‘Clueless in Starting a Business’.
His book ‘Master Your Mind, Design Your Destiny’ which was the second highest selling book in Singapore in 2004, was on the best-sellers list for 36 consecutive weeks. His latest two books are ‘The Secrets Of Self-Made Millionaires’ and ‘Secrets of Millionaire Investors’ which have both stayed on the Number One Spot on the Straits Times Best Sellers List for more than 52 weeks. His most recent books are ‘Nurturing the Winner and Genius in Your Child’, launched in April 2008 and ‘Secrets of Building Multi-Million Dollar Businesses’ launched October 2008. His latest book is ‘Profit from the Panic’ launched in January 2009.
Adam holds an honors degree in business administration from the National University of Singapore. As an undergraduate, he was ranked among the top one percent of academic achievers and became a pioneer in the Talent Development Program, which is the university’s Gifted program.
Over the last 15 years, he has trained over 350,000 students, teachers, professionals, executives and business owners to tap their personal power and achieve excellence in their various fields of endeavor. Some of his corporate clients include ST Engineering, Singapore Police Force, F&N Coca Cola, Infocomm Development Authority (IDA), Ministry of Defence, AIA, Prudential Assurance, Ernst & Young, Exxon Mobil, Unilever, Citibank, UOB, ABN Ambro, NETS, Great Eastern Life, Hewlett Packard, Sun Microsystems, Texas Instruments, Mediacorp and many more.
His success and achievements are regularly featured in regional media like the Straits Times, the Business Times, the New Paper, Lianhe Zaobao, Channel News Asia, Channel U, Channel 8, Newsradio 938, The Hindu, The Malaysian Sun and many more. He was recently ranked among the top 25 richest Singaporeans under the age of 40 by the Executive Magazine. In 2008, Adam was awarded the NUS Business School Eminent Alumni Award for being one of Singapore’s most successful and prominent business leaders.
What i like about his teaching;
1) Technique proven & realistic (down to earth)
2) He uses the NLP concepts effectively to train people
3) He is a modest person even with his success today and always willing to help people regardless of his background.
4) He creates opportunities for people which lead them to success. Pls read on Adam Wong success stories in Adam Khoo blog link; http://www.adam-khoo.com/
5) Most of his advise is readily available and you do not need to find or create new skills to grow
In line with my common roots of believes;
1) Persistence & passion will only constraint our path towards excellence with daily supplements that is your habits (unconscious consistent actions you take that are in line with what you are suppose to do to achieve your goals).
2) Life is like a Maze; Yes if you have play any maze puzzle game then you would realized there is always a start & finish point. Same believe I had that God created a maze for each & everyone of us to solve this algorithm depending on the complexity he has programme for each individuals. So do not be discourage by the probelms or misfortune that happen in our life because ultimately you will find your way out if do not give up. Take probelms as a tap on your shoulder or a voice from the angel who are watching us in the maze to make a change in the direction we choose to the correct passage.
3) Save & Save!!!; I know many people may not agree with Adam on this because most tends to focus on how to generate more income for luxury lifestlye spending. The probelm is we spend most of our money in unneccesary stuffs which may be much more worthwhile to invest on something else instead like knowledge, training, education, health etc..Look at some of the famous celebrities & athletes superstar like Mike Tyson, Michael jackson, Bjorn Borg, MC hammer & many more who blew their fortune away through inane spending & unwise investment.
4) 2 things that only belong to you; Yourself & the people around you (families, friends & parents) not your wealth, property, diamonds etc because these so called precious valuable belongings as advertised in many commercial advertisement can be lost easily! You can't loose your life or your love ones unless God decided to or your own actions to end the relationship with say your wife, friends, collegues, some even parents! Adam focus on 2 things as well in his NLP teaching which is personal mastery & people mastery.
5) Be what you are born to be!!; Remember the maze God created for each of us and they are actually programme based on the role we have been assigned to. So not all goals must be wealth or money inclined because these will be rewarded naturally after you have achieved the right goals fitted for your role. This is to say you should set goals that have higher chance of achieving based on your skills, passion, knowledge etc and not things like I want to buy a 3000sqm house or the latest BMW 7 series model when I turn 40. It can be something close to your daily work or activities like maybe I would like to help 90% of my students to attain a score of min 60pts for their math subject in the next semester exam if you are teacher or it can be at a bigger scale like developing the latest vaccine for disease, largest theme park in Asia & so forth. Your goal should be measureable to allow yourself to assess the things you have done and what you have achieve at the end of the dateline. Adam Khoo also mentioned in his Ultimate Succes Formula the importance of goal settings and it does not mean you fail when you do not meet your goals. The reason is because you are actually progressing as you work towards your goals by assessing your failure & change your strategies to switch you back on course.
6) Value you must sell; I believe once you have set goals for your life, you will start working on your actions, strategies blar blar.. but eventually you develop values where people would like to pay a premium for your service or products because you help them solve their probelms where they could not get from anywhere else. This is why many companies always focus on the core values & core competencies in their mission statement whenever they present to their employees or customers.
7) Time is money; A common self explanatory statement but have we ever sit down & think if we have spend our time most effectively.
8) Talk less & do more; Another common statement we often listen. Thats right no more just listening to what other people have to say. Just bite & go, start taking actions now, don't be afraid if you do not know anything because you will gradually learn along the way from your mistakes & experiences.
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